


Come On

by unoriginal_liz



Series: lwd himym au of doom [5]
Category: Life with Derek
Genre: AU, F/M, Inspired by How I Met Your Mother
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-16
Updated: 2012-07-16
Packaged: 2018-07-23 22:10:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7481814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unoriginal_liz/pseuds/unoriginal_liz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“What if it’s the right person…but the wrong time?  What do you do then?”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Come On

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah. A take on 'Come On.'

**_“Okay, kids – you’re probably thinking that the break-up with Kendra made the situation between your Aunt Casey and myself a lot easier” –_ **

**_“Dad. We’re talking about you and Aunt Casey. My thought process at the moment doesn’t really extend beyond, ‘Ew.’”_ **

**_“What? You think it’s wrong for me to have had a life before I met your mother?”_ **

**_“No – I think it’s wrong that you’re telling us about this life before mom.”_ **

**_“Actually – I think it’s worse than wrong. It’s gross.”_ **

**_“Well that settles it. I have to tell the story now.”_ **

**_“Wow. Dad continues story. There’s a shocker.”_ **

**_“You two have entirely the wrong idea about what happened between me and your Aunt Casey. It was one of the most important experiences of my life. And it wasn’t gross. Or ew.”_ **

**_“How about we just take your word for that, and call it even?”_ **

**_“Or how about you both sit back down, and I prove it?”_ **

 

*****

 

**_“Okay, so, as I was saying, when Kendra and I broke up, I thought there was nothing else that could get in the way of me and Casey. But it turns out, there was one more obstacle, and that was” –_ **

“ – Max Miller, reporting for Metro News One, wishing all our viewers a very good evening.”

**_“Max Miller was the lead anchor on Metro News One. And your Aunt Casey had liked him from the first moment they met” –_ **

“ – and that’s Max Miller, who you’ll be working with. Well – working near,” the woman with the clipboard qualified as she walked Casey down the corridor. As Casey made a move to cross the distance between them, the woman grabbed her arm and pulled her back. “Rule one – you don’t initiate conversation with Max Miller,” she said. “Rule two – try to avoid making eye contact with him. You’re not on his level, and you need to show him that you respect that.”

Just then, Max Miller excused himself from the two people he had been talking to, and walked over to Casey and her escort. “Hi,” he smiled. “I’m Max Miller.” He held out his hand.

Casey resolutely looked down as she shook it. “Casey McDonald,” she told the floor, “The newest member of the Metro News One team. I look forward to working with…I mean around…I mean – in your vicinity.”

Max studied her, bemused. “My eyes are up here,” he said, bending his knees a little, and tilting his head, trying to make eye-contact with her. “It’s okay to look at me while we’re talking…unless there’s something wrong with my face?”

“Oh n…” Casey began to deny, as she looked up – but trailed off, staring. After a few seconds, Max raised his eyebrows. “Um – no,” she said, in a different, softer tone of voice, eyes still fixed on his face, “Nothing…wrong.”

“Good to hear,” Max said, smiling at her. He began to walk away, only to turn around again. “Oh, and Casey? I’m looking forward to working with you, too.”

 

*****

 

**_“Of course, nothing could happen between them because Max had a girlfriend – his personal stylist Amy Williams. And, even when he didn’t – they had a weird on-again, off-again thing going on – both Max and your Aunt Casey had an unofficial ‘no dating coworkers’ rule. Still – she liked him. She liked him enough to overlook the one thing everyone who watched the show noticed about him. And that thing was – kids, you know that people come in all shapes, sizes, and colours. But Max…well, if life was a box of crayons…he was definitely” –_ **

“DayGlo,” Derek said, squinting at the magazine picture. “It _burns._ ”

Casey glared at him.

“Come on, Derek – it’s not that bad,” Sam said, and she smiled approvingly at him. “He’s…more of a – rich pumpkin.”

“Atomic tangerine,” Sheldon said, with a knowledgeable head-nod. “Our kitchen in Newfoundland was that exact shade. It increases productivity. My mom can make seven sandwiches in under three minutes.”

Casey made an indignant noise and turned to Emily, waiting for her support. When it didn’t come, she poked her in the side. “Hmm?” Emily said, and shook her head. “Oh. Right. Uh – it’s not that bad? He’s still cute. It’s only noticeable because they posed him in front of that yellow backdrop.”

“No, it’s noticeable because he’s _orange_ ,” Derek disagreed.

“He’s not _orange_ ,” Casey insisted. She took up the magazine for a closer look, and Derek immediately knocked the pages from her hands. “Shsht! If you stare directly at it – you’ll go blind!” He thought for a moment. “Oh wait,” he picked up the magazine, and handed it back to her, “on second thought – knock yourself out.”

“ _Max is not orange_ ,” Casey said, through gritted teeth.

“Right – the camera just adds ten pounds. Of crayola,” Derek said.

 

*****

 

**_“At any other time, your Aunt Casey’s history with Max Miller wouldn’t have mattered. And, really, it shouldn’t have mattered even then, because Casey was single, and so was I – but I was really planning on fixing that as soon as possible.”_ **

“So, I’m thinking about – asking Casey out,” Sam said. He tapped his fingers on the kitchen countertop and waited for Emily to react. And waited.

“Did you hear me?” he asked. “I kind of need you to say something – I kind of…made a huge decision here.”

“Well maybe you shouldn’t have,” Emily said suddenly. “Maybe you shouldn’t have made it at all.”

“I shouldn’t?”

“What? No. No. It’s just…such a big decision – how can you know you’re doing the right thing?”

“If it’s the right person – you’ll know, right?”

“But how do you know it’s the right person?” Emily asked.

Sam frowned. “You just know. It’s the right person,” he said with certainty.

She sighed. “Yeah. It is. But – what if it’s the wrong _time_?”

“What?”

“What if it’s the right person…but the wrong time? What do you do then?” she asked, placing her palms flat on the table and leaning in close, looking – for Emily – scarily intense.

“I…have no idea,” Sam said.

She slumped. “Me neither.”

 

*****

 

**_“I didn’t really understand what Emily meant…but Derek seemed to – when I talked to him at lunch.”_ **

“So – first weekend of freedom,” Derek said. “I’m thinking we go all out – hit the clubs, the bars – live the nightlife to the full. You and me – just like old times. What do you say?”

“I say – that sounds great,” Sam said. “And I also say…how about we invite Casey?”

Derek considered this. “We could,” he said. “And we could also stick toothpicks in our eyes and pretend they’re olives. But why would we _want_ to do either of those things?”

“Because I think it’d be cool to hang out with Casey?” Sam said, with a hopeful smile. He paused. "I'm okay with skipping the toothpick thing."

Derek reached across the table, and grabbed Sam’s half-full glass. “I’m cutting you off, right now.”

Sam sighed, and took the glass back. “That’s water. And I’m not drunk. And…” he took a deep breath, “You should know that, since I broke up with Kendra, I’ve been thinking about Casey a lot, and I’ve decided that…I want to be with her.”

He waited for Derek’s reaction…which was to reach across the table, and take Sam’s glass away from him again. “Friends don’t let friends decide drunk,” he said.

“I’m still not drunk,” Sam told him. 

“Yeah – not the point. The point is – you can’t date Casey.”

“Why not? Why is everyone so against me dating Casey all of a sudden?”

“I’ve always been against you dating Casey,” Derek pointed out. 

“Okay, fine,” Sam acknowledged. “At least you’re consistent – even if you don’t make any sense.”

“Hey – me not wanting you to date Casey makes perfect sense,” Derek protested.

Sam tilted his head. “Okay,” he said. “So tell me – why can’t I date Casey? Give me the reason. Come on – let me in on the big ‘why not.’”

“Because I don’t want you to,” Derek said, as if it was completely obvious.

Sam sat back in his seat, unimpressed. “Dude – that stopped being a valid reason when we were five.” He studied Derek. “You can’t even think of a real reason, can you?”

“Of course I can think of a reason,” Derek insisted.

Sam crossed his arms and waited.

“If you two start going out – she’s going to want to hang out with us all the time,” Derek said. “She’s going to be _everywhere_. It would change everything.”

Sam thought about this, really considering Derek’s point. “Except…she already hangs out with us all the time,” he said. “So I don’t see _how_ it would change anything. I mean – obviously, it would change stuff for me, but…I don’t see how it changes anything for _you_.”

“Yeah, well, it would.”

“Why?”

“Because it just would,” he said, sounding exasperated.

“Still not a reason,” Sam said.

“Everyone,” Derek said suddenly.

“What?”

“You said everyone was against you dating Casey – if everyone’s against it, then…maybe you need to – not do it.”

“I was exaggerating,” Sam said. “I mean – okay, Emily’s reaction could have been better, but all she said was something about it not being the right time, which I don’t really get…but she didn’t tell me to not go for it, or anything.”

“The wrong time,” Derek repeated, then, in a stronger voice, “There’s your reason right there. It’s the wrong time.”

Sam blinked. “How can it be the wrong time? I mean – if I was still with Kendra, it would be the wrong time. But I broke up with her.”

“Exactly,” Derek said. “You _just_ broke up with Kendra. If you go after Casey now, it’s going to look like she’s the rebound girl. You don’t want her to think that – do you?”

Sam frowned. “You really think she’d think that?” 

“It’s _Casey_ ,” Derek said simply.

Sam considered this essential truth, before deciding, “I guess it couldn’t hurt to hold off for a while. I mean – just to show Casey I’m serious about her.”

“ _Exactly_ ,” Derek said. “And…while you do that – I’m going to help you forget all about her.”

*****

**_“Of course, all the confusion could have been avoided if your Aunt Emily had just been paying attention. But she was dealing with her own issues at the time, and, well, some things got…lost in translation.”_ **

Emily jumped when her cell phone rang, but relaxed and picked it up when she saw Casey’s name flash on the screen.

“Hey, Em,” Casey said. “I was just calling to find out if you made a decision on the flowers.”

“Um – doing that right now,” Emily said, staring at the computer screen in front of her. “I’m checking out some bouquets online. It’s really helping me – narrow it down.”

“Great!” Casey said.

There was a silence.

“Is that all?” Emily asked.

“Yeah,” Casey said. “Yeah. That’s…everything.”

“Okay,” Emily said. “Well – I’d better get back to” –

“Um – except…maybe – I thought if all the wedding plans were going okay – I thought we could maybe talk about…our side project?”

“Side-project?” Emily repeated blankly.

“Me and Sam? You…helping me figure out whether we have a chance or not…?” Casey trailed off expectantly.

“Oh. Right. Side-project. Of course. Sorry, Case,” Emily said. She held the phone between her shoulder and her ear as she began typing.

“Well?” Casey asked. “Has Sam…said anything about me? Anything at all?”

“Uh…no,” Emily said. “He hasn’t said anything to me. Not yet, anyway. Sorry, Case.”

“It’s okay,” Casey said. “Really. I was just…wondering.”

“I’ll keep my eyes and ears open though,” Emily promised. “So – listen, do you mind if I call you back? I’m kind of in the middle of something right now, and” –

“Of course! Em – I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be bothering you with this stuff! You have more important things to worry about – you’re planning the most important day of your life! You know what? From now on, it’s going to be all wedding, all the time when I talk to you – I promise.”

“Oh – you don’t have to do that, Case. Really,” Emily said.

“No, I insist,” Casey said. “As your friend, it’s the least I can do.”

Emily swallowed. “Thanks.”

“No problem. Talk to you soon! Oh – and print some pictures of your final flower choices!”

Emily put down her cell phone, and stared at the computer screen for a second, before aiming her mouse, closing her eyes, and clicking.

 

*****

 

**_“Of course, all the confusion could also have been avoided if your Aunt Casey had talked to me, or even your Uncle Sheldon. But instead, she chose the worst Emily substitute possible.”_ **

“I need to think positively,” Casey said, as she slipped onto the seat opposite Derek. “I need to analyse the situation, and be proactive. What do you think?”

After a moment of silence during which both parties stared at each other, Derek put his elbows on the table and leaned in. “I don’t know how to break it to you, but…it looks like even your other personalities aren’t listening anymore.”

“I was talking to _you_ ,” she said, in exasperation.

“Why?”

She sighed. “Because we’re friends now? Remember – last week?”

“That wasn’t friendship,” Derek told her, “that was Stockholm Syndrome.”

She argued, “It was a special night” –

“Is that what they’re calling felonies these days?”

She waved this away, continuing as if she hadn’t been interrupted, “– and it _changed_ things between us…because it helped me figure out that – you like me.”

Derek made a series of indecipherable noises that were probably intended to convey vehement disagreement, but Casey ignored him. “You always have. You just haven’t admitted it yet. You’re using denial as a coping strategy. Classic Derek.” She shook her head, sounding almost fond.

A succession of different expressions made their way across Derek’s face as he opened and closed his mouth. Finally, he said, “Okay, first of all, I don’t like you – and second – I’m not denying _anything_.”

“Good,” she said. “So you _admit_ that we’re friends! This is perfect. Your timing couldn’t be better. Emily’s really busy with wedding stuff, so I could really use your impartial advice on the Sam situation.” She sighed. “I just don’t know what to do.”

“Yeah, I still don’t ca – what situation?” he asked. “You don’t _have_ a situation with Sam.”

“Exactly!” she said. “I mean – it’s been a week since he and Kendra broke up, and…nothing. I just thought” –

“ – but you were wrong,” Derek said, quickly finishing her sentence. “You thought something, but you were wrong. Classic _Casey_. Now you just need to hole up in your room for a couple of days and cry about whatever it is this time, and…problem solved.”

Casey rolled her eyes. “Thanks for the suggestion, but – strangely enough – I don’t think my problem can be solved by hiding out in my room and avoiding all human contact.”

“Oh wait – yeah, you’re right…that would solve all _my_ problems.”

“I need to _deal_ with this,” she said, “Tackle it head-on.” She thought for a second. “Maybe _I_ should ask _Sam_ out!”

“What? No,” Derek said. “That’s a terrible idea!”

“No it’s not!” she disagreed. “It takes care of everything – it shows Sam how I feel, assuming that he still hasn’t realised, _and_ it provides the perfect opportunity for him to – reciprocate.”

“Yeah – but…what if he says no?” Derek asked.

The look on Casey’s face wobbled between apprehension and determination before she said, simply, “Well then – at least I’ll _know_.”

“Yeah,” Derek said slowly, “but…what if he says yes?” He raised his eyebrows at her, like she should already realize the problem. 

She frowned. “What? If he says yes then – we go out. We start dating. And everything is…perfect.” She smiled, and a faraway look drifted across her face.

Derek clicked his fingers at her, snapping her out of it. “Except – he just broke up with Kendra.”

“And?”

“Do you really want to be his – rebound girl?”

She looked at him, before asking, “You really think I’d be the rebound girl?” She sounded unsure.

“Do you want to run the risk?” Derek asked.

Slowly, she said, “I don’t want to be Sam’s rebound girl.”

“Great,” he said. “So – we’re agreed. You’re going to sit tight and – wait it out. For as _long_ as Sam needs you to. It’s probably going to take a while, but it’s a solid strategy, and I _know_ you’ve got the follow-through.” He made a fist and aimed at Casey’s shoulder, only to veer to the side, avoiding making contact and looking vaguely horrified at his own actions. 

Casey appeared not to notice this. “But I’m tired of waiting,” she said. “It feels like –that’s all I’ve done since I’ve met Sam. And I can’t – do it anymore.” She straightened her shoulders. “I want something to _happen_. I _need_ something to happen. Right now.”

**_“Kids, there are times when the Universe gives you exactly what you want. There are other times when it gives you exactly what you need. And just then, at that particular point in time, the Universe was preparing to give your Aunt Casey exactly…what she asked for.”_ **

*****

**_“The evening broadcast went smoothly, apart from one deviation from the script – but it was an important one…”_ **

“This is Max Miller of Metro News One, saying goodnight…and – on a more personal note – goodbye. I would like to take this opportunity to announce that this week is my last as lead anchor of Metro News One.”

Casey, sitting beside him, whipped her head around to stare, but quickly recovered her poise, even if her eyes did keep darting to the side, and the smile on her face held an edge of panicked uncertainty.

“ – sorry to be leaving. I wish the show, and my coworkers, continued success. To my loyal viewers I say – it has been an honour to be the face you associate with current events and natural disasters. Goodnight Toronto, and thank you.”

The second the cameras stopped rolling, Casey whirled around in her seat. “You’re leaving?”

Max smiled. “I got an offer from CityNews.”

“Wow,” Casey said. “Congratulations. That’s huge.”

“I know. I still have trouble believing it myself.”

“Well…we’ll miss you,” Casey said. “I’ll – miss you.”

“Thanks,” he said, and paused. “Hey…listen – I’m getting together with a couple of my friends this weekend, a small celebration – I have a cabin by the lake…” He looked at her. “You should come.”

“What?” Casey said, stunned. “That’s – I – it’s really nice of you to offer, but…I couldn’t just…barge in on your party…”

“Sure you could – I’m inviting you, remember?” He smiled easily and said, “At least think about it, okay?”

She nodded, and as she watched him walk away, he turned, and said, “Oh – and Casey? I’m going to miss you too…but – there’s another part of me that’s kind of…glad we’re not coworkers any more.”

 

*****

 

**_“Kids, when I look back, the thing that always surprises me isn’t how this story ends, or even how it fits into the bigger scheme of our lives. No, what surprises me, is the fact that, at this particular point in time, we were all taking advice from your Uncle Derek…”_ **

Sheldon sat on the couch next to Derek, a look of intense concentration on his face. Moments passed, and he shook his head. “No – I still don’t hear anything.” He adjusted his body on the couch to face Derek. “So – like I was saying, I could really use your advice.”

Derek considered this. “But what about that sound I heard the first time you asked for my advice? I think I hear it again.”

“It’s Emily,” Sheldon said, and Derek sighed, dropping his head against the back of the couch. “I mean, she’s been a little – stressed, lately, about the wedding. I know that. She told me that. And it’s not a big deal or anything…a lot of people get a little nervous before their weddings, it’s standard – nothing to worry about…” He stopped. “But – choosing the invitations…that was a good sign, right?”

He waited for some acknowledgment from Derek, which never came.

“And now – now I’m wondering whether I should roll with that, and try to get Emily more involved with the wedding, or whether I should back off, and let her deal with things in her own time.”

“I think you should talk to Sam about it,” Derek told him. “He’s usually better at pretending to care.”

Sheldon made a face. “Don’t get me wrong,” he said. “Sam’s a great guy. But he can be a little…oblivious sometimes. And he’s not really focusing on the big picture here. I mean, right now, he’s all…’Casey, Casey, Casey.’” 

“Not after this weekend,” Derek informed him, sounding determined. “This weekend, it’s bye-bye lame post-Casey ‘wants-to-settle-down-Sam’, and welcome back pre-Casey ‘fun-and-single-Sam.’” At Sheldon’s confused look he explained, “I’m taking him out this weekend and helping him forget about her.”

Sheldon took this in. “Or maybe if he and Casey got together, that would solve” –

“No,” Derek said, very definitely.

Sheldon accepted this with a slow nod of his head. “O-kay. But – I was kind of hoping we could get back to Emily and what I should do.” He looked at Derek expectantly. “You know…try to get Emily more involved with the wedding, or give her some time to deal with things on her own.”

“The last one sounds good,” Derek hazarded.

“Yeah. Okay,” Sheldon said. He looked up at the ceiling for a second, before meeting Derek’s eyes again. “It’s just – there’s not really a lot of time for her to do that. There’s way too much to do to make sure the wedding happens – and I don’t think I can do it all alone.”

“Then go with the first one,” Derek said, with a half-shrug.

“Yeah,” Sheldon said. “Yeah.” He opened his mouth as if he was going to say something else, but before he could, there was a rattle of the doorknob, and Emily entered, carrying a carton of milk. 

“Hey guys,” she called, as she headed to the kitchen and put the milk into the fridge. She wandered over and propped herself on the arm of the couch near Derek. “Where’s Sam?”

“Getting takeout,” Derek said, as he scribbled something down on a sheet of paper on the coffee table.

Emily’s cell phone rang and she answered it. 

“Hey Case – what’s going on?” She leaned back on the couch, only to sit back up abruptly. “Yeah, he’s here. Oh. Are you sure? …okay.”

She held out the phone to Derek. “She wants to talk to you,” she said. It came out sounding like a question.

Derek frowned but took the phone.

“Derek?” Casey said. “Good – you’re there. I really shouldn’t have involved Emily even in a superficial way on non-wedding related business, but you never gave me your number.”

“Sure I did,” Derek disagreed.

He heard her sigh down the phone before saying, “No. You gave me a _wrong_ number – which I found out when I tried to call it. Anyway – that’s not important right now – I’m having a crisis.”

“You’re always having a crisis,” he pointed out. “It’s not like that’s new.”

“Max just asked me to a party at his cabin by the lake this weekend!”

Derek made a confused face. “Who?”

“Max! Max Miller!”

“Not ringing a bell,” he told her.

“My _co-anchor_? Well, he’s _currently_ my co-anchor, but” –

“Amber Alert?” Derek interrupted. “You’re going to a party with Amber Alert?”

“No – he _asked_ me to a party. Which is why I’m calling you. What should I do?”

“Bring your sunglasses?”

“Derek! I’m serious! Should I go or not? I mean – it’s a great opportunity and it was really sweet of him to ask me” –

“So go,” Derek said.

“Go?”

“Yeah. Go. Crisis solved.”

“I – can’t just _go_.”

“Why not?”

“I…can’t think of a reason,” she said, sounding thrown.

“So there you go,” Derek said, with a flourish of his free hand that was obviously completely lost on her.

“And I guess…you can’t think of any reason anybody else might have for me to – not go?” she asked.

“Can’t think of anything,” he said cheerfully, gripping the phone to his ear.

There was a silence on the other end of the line, until Casey said, sounding determined, “You know what? You’re right. I mean, I was just saying I wanted something to happen, and now that it has…I have to go with it. I need to…take this opportunity to move forward. Thank you, Derek.”

“I’m hanging up now,” Derek informed her.

“Oh, okay – say hi to” –

He hung up and handed the cell phone back to Emily, who took it from him with a bemused expression on her face. “What was _that_ all about?”

Derek shrugged. “The usual Casey conniption,” he said.

“Okay – that I believe, but…you talking her through it? That’s new.”

“Apparently, weddings give you immunity from Casey’s craptastrophes. Congratulations,” Derek said. “But – there’s some good news. Turns out Safety Orange is throwing a party by the lake this weekend, and I talked her into going. Which leaves Sam totally free for our ‘Forget Casey’ weekend.” He took hold of a glass of water on the coffee table, and held it up in a vague toast before talking a long gulp.

Emily and Sheldon stared at him. “You talked her into going to a party with _Max Miller_?” Emily said. “The Max Miller she’s always had a huge crush on?”

“Sam’s not going to like that,” Sheldon chimed in.

“What? It’s not like anything’s going to happen,” Derek said. “Casey still has that stupid ‘no dating people she works with’ rule, right?”

“Yeah. Except Max quit the show this evening,” Emily told him.

“What?” Derek sat up on the couch, swinging his legs from the coffee table onto the floor. “He quit?”

“Live and on the air,” Emily said. “So by tomorrow evening, he won’t be Casey’s coworker anymore.”

Derek frowned. Slowly he said, “But – he still has that girlfriend, right?”

“Amy Williams?” Sheldon said. “They broke up two months ago. There was a small article on the back page of _Toronto Living_.” He looked at Derek. “You didn’t see it?”

“So you just basically talked Casey into a date,” Emily said.

“Sam’s going to be devastated,” Sheldon said, just as the door swung open, and Sam walked in, a bag of takeout in his hands.

“Why is Sam going to be devastated?” he asked, as he moved over to the coffee table and put the bag down.

“No reason,” Derek said, immediately pulling out and opening the plastic containers of food.

Emily and Sheldon looked at each other before Emily said, “Casey’s going to a party this weekend. With Max.”

Sam stared at her. “What – like a date?”

“It’s not a date,” Derek said immediately, as he stabbed his fork through several pieces of chicken. “It’s just” –

“Casey going to a party. With a guy she likes,” Sam finished. “Sounds kind of like a date to me.” He shook his head. “I can’t believe this. I was going to tell her how I feel – but," his eyes met Derek's, "you told me to wait. You told me to wait…and now – now she’s going on a date with someone else.”

“It’s not a date,” Derek said again.

Sam looked at him accusingly. “I never should have listened to you.”

“Hey – look on the bright side,” Derek said, fork moving relentlessly through his food, “At least this gives you an extra incentive to forget about Casey this weekend.”

“You know what? I’m not that hungry anymore,” Sam said. He pushed past the couch and a moment later, the door to his room closed.

“Someone should probably…” Sheldon said, gesturing after Sam as he stood. But halfway to Sam’s room he stopped and turned. “Um – Em…there are a couple of things,” he waved a hand at some papers on the coffee table, “you know, for the wedding. And I was wondering if you’d mind having a look. I mean – only if you want to” –

“Of course I want to!” Emily interrupted quickly. She immediately grabbed the sheaf of papers.

“You do?” Sheldon asked. A smile spread across his face.

“Of course,” she said again. “It’s – our wedding. Of course I want to – it’d be weird if I didn’t.”

But as soon as Sheldon opened the door to Sam’s room and went in, Emily’s studying of the papers became a lot more desultory, and after a moment, she left them fall into her lap. 

“So – Sam and Casey,” she said to Derek. “I didn’t know he was going to tell her how he felt. Do you think we should call her?”

“No,” Derek said, looking up from his raiding of Sheldon’s order, “Because Sam wasn’t going to tell her. Maybe he _thinks_ he was going to tell her, but really he was going to follow tradition and wuss out at the last minute.”

Emily tilted her head to the side, appearing to concede the probable truth of this. “Maybe you’re right.” After another moment, she spoke again. “Maybe this date with Max will be good for her – it might help her to finally move on and get over Sam.”

Derek popped the lid on Sam’s food.

Emily looked down at the sheets in her lap again, and silence reigned for a while. Then, without looking up, Emily said, “Derek…if you had two choices, and neither of them was what you wanted, but you really had to make a decision…what would you do?”

“That kind of thing doesn’t happen to me,” Derek said, looking down at his empty takeout container.

Emily half smiled. “Right. Of course it doesn’t,” she said quietly.

“But,” he said suddenly, making her head snap up, “ _If_ it did – I’d find a way to make one of those choices work for me.”

“But what if you can’t?” she asked.

He met her eyes and stated, “There’s always a way to make it work for you.”

Thoughtfully, Emily stared down at the sheets she was holding, while Derek emptied the remainder of Sam’s takeout order into his own container.

*****

**_“Kids, by the time I came out of my room, I was convinced of one thing. Well…two if you count your Uncle Sheldon talking me into believing that personalised sunflower pot pens were appropriate wedding favours. But that’s not important – what is important is that, when I came out of that room I had made a final, unalterable decision about your Aunt Casey.”_ **

“I’m going to tell her how I feel,” Sam told Derek.

“You can’t,” Derek said immediately.

“But I have to. Maybe if she knows how I feel…she won’t go.” Sam sighed. “Listen – I know you don’t like Casey, but” –

“Whoa,” Derek said, holding up his hands. “Whoa. This isn’t about me, or how I feel about Casey…who I _obviously don’t_ – like…” He trailed off and cleared his throat. “This is about you, and how not telling Casey how you feel about her is the right thing to do.”

“It’s the right thing to do?” Sam said. He sounded unconvinced.

From the vicinity of Sheldon and Emily’s bedroom came a faint exclamation of, “Personalised sunflower pot pens!” but both parties in the living room ignored that.

“Yeah,” Derek said. “I mean – think about it. Did Casey try to break you and Kendra up?”

“No,” Sam admitted. 

“No,” Derek agreed. “She,” he rolled his eyes, “ _respected_ you and your choices. So how does it look when you tell her how you feel – the second it looks like she might be moving on?” 

Sam didn’t say anything, but to ensure the message got through, Derek spelled it out. “It looks like you care more about _your_ feelings than hers.”

A frustrated sound bubbled out of Sam’s mouth, and his head fell back against the couch. Derek put a hand on his shoulder.

“I want to respect Casey’s choices,” Sam said suddenly, “I do. It’s just…I don’t want her to date that guy.”

“Relax – she’s not going to date Safety Orange.”

Sam threw a glance at Derek. “She’s going to a party with him this weekend. Sounds like a date to me.”

In response, Derek said, “Remember what Casey did when you and Kendra were dating?”

Sam frowned. “She didn’t do anything.”

“Exactly. Because she knew she could count on you to screw it up yourself. And you’re way more normal than Casey. Trust me, she doesn’t need you to sabotage this thing.”

Sam half-inclined his head, apparently acknowledging the truth of this, but said doubtfully, “Yeah…but by tomorrow?”

“Dude, it’s _Casey_.” A sanctimonious smirk crept onto his face. “You know, you could try having a little faith in her.” 

Sam didn’t say anything, and with a sideways glance at him, Derek continued, “Anyway, by the time this weekend is over, it’s not going to matter. Because by then _you_ will have forgotten all about…whatshername.”

“Yeah, I don’t know,” Sam made a face. “I don’t think I want to” –

“You _have_ to,” Derek insisted. In a slightly calmer voice he continued, “And seriously, there’s no way she’s going to that party, so you’ve got no reason to bail.”

Sam thought about this. “You really think she’s not going to go?”

“I guarantee it,” Derek said, kicking out his feet and putting his hands behind his head. “All we have to do is sit back, and let nature take its course.”

 

*****

 

_**“Now your Uncle Derek might have sounded confident…but it turned out, he wasn’t totally against giving nature a helping hand, and the next day, he turned up at your Aunt Casey’s workplace.”** _

“Nice try, but I’m still not going to introduce you to our weathergirl,” Casey said, as she brushed by him.

“I didn’t come here for tips on how to pick up Sunny with a serious chance of flirting,” Derek said.

Casey tossed a disbelieving look his way. “Then why did you show up?”

“I don’t think you should go to Clockwork Orange’s party this weekend.”

“What? Why not?”

“Don’t you already have plans this weekend? Didn’t we decide you were going to spend that time alone in your room, crying?”

“No, you decided that,” Casey said. “Anyway, everything’s already arranged. I’m getting a taxi out to Max’s place this evening and he’s going to drive us both to his cabin.”

Derek didn’t respond to this. Instead he said, “Doesn’t Orangina already have a significant Oompa-Loompa?”

“He broke up with Amy.”

“Right.” Derek nodded. “So, you don’t want to be _Sam’s_ rebound girl, but you’ve got no problem being Tropicana’s?”

“They broke up months ago,” Casey told him.

“Well – yeah, but…those two? It’s never going to take. And do you really want to waste your time until the inevitable happens and he finally makes her Mrs Mystic Tan?” He raised his eyebrows at her.

“Amy’s already engaged to someone else,” Casey said. She crossed her arms over her chest. “What is this _really_ about, Derek? Last night you practically pushed me into saying yes.”

“Yeah, well, today I don’t think you should go.”

She tipped her head to the side and scrutinized him. “Why?” she asked, then held up a hand as he opened his mouth, “And I’m only interested if you give me a _real_ answer. Why shouldn’t I go with Max this weekend?”

“Because…” Derek stared at her, “…he’s orange.”

“I said a _real_ reason.”

“That’s not _enough_ of a reason for you? If you look directly at him, you could go blind.”

Casey frowned. “That’s not a reason, that’s…” A wondering look suddenly spread across her face, and she asked, a little hesitantly, “Did…Sam say something” –

“No,” Derek denied immediately. “Why would _Sam_ care about you going to this party?”

Her shoulders slumped slightly, but her voice was determined as she said, “Then I don’t have any reason _not_ to go.”

“ _He’s orange_ ,” he repeated.

Casey exhaled in frustration. “Derek – I can’t _do_ this anymore. I’m so tired of focusing on my career and not having a boyfriend or a personal life” –

“It’s just a phase,” Derek argued. “I mean – you’ve never had a personal life before.”

“Well maybe that’ll change this weekend,” Casey said, sounding determined – but she wavered when she caught Derek’s eye. “It’s just…if I was going to stay, I’d need a real reason. Something real. Some _one_ real.”

Derek looked at her, expressionless.

“If I’m not going with Max – then I need to stay…for Sam.” She straightened up. “So – what’s it going to be?”

**_“Kids, in the second before he answered your Aunt Casey – your Uncle Derek realised that there are some choices that you just can’t make work for you…no matter how good you are.”_ **

“Enjoy the party,” he said.

 

*****

 

_**“It turned out that your Uncle Derek’s advice wasn’t working for anyone that day – which your Aunt Emily and Uncle Sheldon found out in the worst way a couple of hours later.”** _

Emily grabbed her phone from her purse and answered it. “Hey Sheldon!” she said, looking back at the lights as she waited for them to change.

“Em!” he said. “Did you get a chance to visit the bakery?”

“Just left ten minutes ago,” she informed him.

“Great!” he said, sounding pleased. “What did you think?”

“Um…yeah,” she said. “It’s good. I’m…making it work for me.”

“Good! Good. Hey – I know you gave me your cousin’s email address last night, but I can’t find it, so do you mind if I look through your inbox to get it?”

The lights changed. “What? No, of course not. You know my password, right?” Emily said absently, as she made her way across the street.

Only to stop suddenly. “Sheldon – Sheldon, wait! Actually, I do mind!”

People swarmed around her, and someone jostled her, making her lurch forwards. She didn’t seem to register the shove, though she kept moving.

“But I’m right in front of the computer – it’ll only take a second,” Sheldon said.

On the other side of the street she said urgently, “Sheldon! Sheldon, listen to me! Don’t go into my inbox, okay? I’ll do it – I’ll email her, just – just don’t look at my emails, okay?” She stopped. “Sheldon?”

In a very different tone of voice, he said, “Em…why is there a flight itinerary for Sydney, Australia in your inbox?”

 

*****

 

**_“I met your Uncle Derek at the bar later that evening, ready for our ‘Forget Casey’ weekend. But…that didn’t exactly go according to plan either…”_ **

As soon as Sam slid into the seat opposite Derek, Derek said, as if continuing a conversation, “Okay, this weekend we are going _seriously_ B.C.”

Sam wrinkled his nose. “You mean that strip club where the girls wear fur bikinis?”

Derek looked at him. “Before Casey,” he explained.

“Yeah. Great.” Sam fidgeted in his seat. “So…did you hear anything from her?”

Derek picked up one of the beermats on the table. “Like what?”

“Like…is she still going to that party with Max?”

Derek appeared to think about it, as he shredded the beermat. “Uh…yeah. I think that’s still on.”

Sam closed his eyes.

“ – so after we hit the B Bar, I’m thinking we head for the Dome, or maybe Club Vivid,” Derek continued relentlessly.

“I don’t think I want to do this tonight,” Sam said. He shrugged at Derek apologetically. “I’m just – not in the mood anymore.”

“Come on,” Derek said, “I’ve got it all planned out. You can’t just bail because Casey’s” –

“I just don’t feel like going out anymore. I think I’m just going to go upstairs,” Sam said. “Stay in.”

Derek released a sharp, angry-sounding breath before looking at Sam, and saying, “You need to face it. Casey’s got a date with Orange Julius this weekend, and I’m betting he probably wants her to – taste the rainbow.”

Sam glared. “Thanks for that image. I really needed that.”

Derek persisted. “But she’s just some girl. She’s not _special_. Whatever you think you – feel about her…it’s not real. It’s just some trick of the light, or sleep deprivation, or – I don’t know – Stockholm Syndrome. It doesn’t _mean_ anything. So we should go out, and just – forget about her.”

Sam didn’t reply. He stared down at the table for a moment before getting to his feet. “I have to go to the bathroom,” he said.

Derek began playing with another beermat, only looking up when –

“Hi.”

“Yah!” He scrambled back in the booth at the sight and sound of Casey. “What are you doing here? I thought you were partying down with your Orange Crush.”

“I thought I’d stop and say goodbye first. And Max is not orange,” she added, almost as an afterthought.

“Well – mission accomplished,” he said, “so I guess we _won’t_ be seeing you…starting now.”

Oblivious to Derek’s hint and less than welcoming body language, Casey said, “So, um…is Sam” –

“Casey?”

Derek closed his eyes.

“Sam,” she said, turning to face him.

“I thought you were going away for the weekend.”

“I am. I just thought I’d say goodbye before I went.”

“Oh,” Sam said. He straightened up. “Well – I’m glad you did. I’ve really – wanted to talk to you, but we haven’t seen each other for the last couple of days” –

In his seat, Derek made a pained face.

“Bad timing,” Casey said, with a small smile.

“Yeah,” Sam agreed, eyes fixed on her face.

“So,” she said, brushing her hair behind her ear, “What did you want to talk to me about?”

Derek stared between them, body tensed.

“I wanted to say…” Sam trailed off, then took a deep breath and finished, “…have a great weekend.”

Casey looked down at the floor – but when she looked back up a moment later, there was a resolute smile on her face. “You too,” she said. She finally seemed to remember Derek’s presence, head turning from one to the other as she said, “Well – I’d better go. I’m getting a taxi from my place soon, so…”

Sam nodded. 

“Bye,” she said, looking mostly at Sam.

“Have a great time,” he said.

“You said that already,” she observed.

“Yeah, well…” he shrugged, and watched until the bar door swung shut behind her. Then he sat back down in his seat, a little deflated looking.

“That was…unexpected,” Derek said, eyeing him warily. “For a second there I thought you were going to go all,” he made an indeterminate hand gesture, “and tell her how you really feel.”

“I was,” Sam said. “But then I realised…you were right. I have to respect Casey’s choices. I really like her, but if she wants to be with that guy…there’s nothing I can do about it.” 

He half-smiled at Derek. “And – maybe you don’t want to hear this, but – I’m not going to forget about Casey anytime soon. I know you want to pretend that everything’s how it used to be, before Casey – but it’s not. And I can’t pretend that it is anymore. I’m sorry.” 

Derek didn’t say anything, and Sam offered, “But we can still hang out tonight, if you want.”

Without looking at him, Derek said, “Casey’s only going out with that guy because she thinks you don’t feel the same way about her.”

“What?”

“Dude. You heard me. Casey wants you to ask her to stay.”

Stunned, Sam said, “Casey wants to be with me?” His gaze sharpened as he realised something. “You knew this, and you didn’t say anything,” he said. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I’m telling you now,” Derek said, voice flat and quiet.

Sam shook his head. “I just – how could you do that? Why would you want to do something like that to your best friend?” Anger made his words come out forcefully.

“Dude.” Derek’s tone was no-nonsense, weary. “You don’t have much time. Do you really want to waste it arguing with me?”

Sam’s lips pressed together and he nodded, once, as he got to his feet.

 

*****

 

**_“Of course, I wasn’t the only one dealing with some big emotional issues. Your Aunt Emily and Uncle Sheldon had just uncovered a problem they couldn’t overlook any more. But before your Aunt Emily arrived home to resolve things once and for all, she stopped downstairs at the bar…”_ **

Neither Emily nor Derek acknowledged the other when she slid in next to him in the booth. But after a few seconds of silence, Emily said, as if they were in the middle of a conversation, “So, the thing is…I don’t think I can make it work for me. Any of it.”

They both stared straight ahead. 

“That – happens sometimes,” Derek admitted. He darted a glance at her, and said, in a low voice, “Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” she said, attempting to smile.

“Is it?” he asked.

Silently, she shook her head.

 

*****

 

_**“And then she went upstairs, to try and explain things to your Uncle Sheldon. This took a while, and even then, your Uncle Sheldon had some problems with it”** _

“ – it’s not like I was going to run out on our wedding,” she said.

Sheldon nodded. “No, of course not. Your flight’s the day after – so technically, you’d be running out on our honeymoon.”

“Sheldon – I was never going to use it,” Emily caught his wrist. “I just – I needed an out.”

“An out?”

Emily bit her lip. “Sheldon this is – it’s scary, okay? It’s _forever_ , and – and I don’t even know…”

“What?” he said.

She took a breath. “It’s like – I’ve been your girlfriend for so long” –

“Fiancee,” he mumbled.

“ – that that’s all I know anymore. I don’t know who I am without you. I can’t even tell the difference between my dreams and yours – I don’t know if I _have_ any dreams, or if they’re all yours.” She dropped his wrist. “I just – sometimes, I feel like I’m just some…supporting character in your happily-ever-after, and that _scares_ me. Do you know what I’m saying?” 

In a low, shaky voice, she said, “Please tell me you understand.”

He met her eyes. “I don’t,” he said simply. “Because…most people don’t need an out when someone asks them to get married.” He took a breath. “Do you even want to marry me?”

Emily stared at him. “Sheldon,” she said, voice choked, “I _love_ you.”

He looked down at the ground and nodded, before looking up again. “That’s nice, Em,” he said. “But it’s not what I asked.”

She breathed in and out hard, a despairing look on her face. “Sheldon – I don’t want to hurt you.” She wiped at her wet cheeks with the heel of her hand.

Sheldon seemed more composed, a half-smile twisting his mouth, but his voice was just as unsteady as Emily’s as he said, “Yeah…from where I’m standing, that’s – looking kind of inevitable.”

He spread his hands a little and said, “So hit me.”

 

*****

 

**_“And as your Uncle Sheldon and Aunt Emily ended things, I was racing to Casey’s apartment building, hoping that I wouldn’t be too late to make a fresh start. But, as I rounded the corner I saw a taxi, pulling away from the kerb.”_ **

Sam slowed, then stopped, watching the yellow cab pull back into traffic. He closed his eyes in defeat, only to open them a second later when he heard a voice call out –

“Sam?”

“Casey?” He stared. She was standing by the steps to her apartment building, looking as surprised to see him as he was to see her.

They started towards each other, and when they were only standing a foot apart, Sam said, “I thought you were going with Max.”

“I was going to,” she said. “But – I decided not to.”

“Why not?” he asked.

She shook her head slightly. “It just…didn’t feel right,” she said. She looked at Sam, and took a deep breath. Tipping her head up, she said, “And anyway, I realised I forgot to do something.”

He smiled. “And what’s that?”

Her hands landed on his shoulders. “This,” she said, and kissed him.

When she pulled back, she smiled and said, “So, why were you chasing after me.”

Sam grinned. “I – uh – I realised I forgot the same thing,” he said, leaning forward again.

 

*****

 

**_“…wow, Dad. Just…wow.”_ **

**_“You know…I’m not as grossed out as I thought I’d be. I guess the research is true. Graphic horror stories do eventually desensitize people.”_ **

**_“My relationship with your Aunt Casey wasn’t a horror story. It was a stepping stone to” –_ **

**_“Even grosser things?”_ **

**_“ – my future – and yours.”_ **

**_“Yeah. I’ll be sure to thank Aunt Casey for the countless hours of therapy I’m going to need by the time this story is finished.”_ **


End file.
